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Gotta Go Fast

Eyebrows. Youbrows. We all browse through my blog.

whorizonwireless:

you are currently a ‘basic bitch’ please upgrade to ‘premium bitch’ for only 3 payments of $19.95

(via jesuschristvevo)

googlebus:

googlebus:

watching sex scenes on planes can be somewhat uncomfortable when you get an erection next to a sweet old lady 

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I’m not asking an old lady to chop my dick off what the frick 

(via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

dennys:

As a young boy, Denny was mocked fiercely and without mercy by the townsfolk. The misguided citizens were severely confused by Denny’s obsession for breakfast foods and the four-cornered-den-of-doom. They ignored young Denny, just as he ignored them. For their opinions were worth less than dirt if they didn’t support his passion, nay, his love. And that’s exactly what he told them the day Denny left town. After his speech he walked silently away from the confused townspeople, then stopped, turned, and said:
"You will remember the name Denny. You will remember my Grand Slams. And I? I will forget each and every one of you."
Denny turned once again, and walked far away.
The townspeople all agreed it was a pretty cold thing to say. But they deserved it. And he was right.

dennys:

As a young boy, Denny was mocked fiercely and without mercy by the townsfolk. The misguided citizens were severely confused by Denny’s obsession for breakfast foods and the four-cornered-den-of-doom. They ignored young Denny, just as he ignored them. For their opinions were worth less than dirt if they didn’t support his passion, nay, his love. And that’s exactly what he told them the day Denny left town. After his speech he walked silently away from the confused townspeople, then stopped, turned, and said:

"You will remember the name Denny. You will remember my Grand Slams. And I? I will forget each and every one of you."

Denny turned once again, and walked far away.

The townspeople all agreed it was a pretty cold thing to say. But they deserved it. And he was right.

kingcheddarxvii:

kingcheddarxvii:

Quick, without checking to see how it’s spelled, tell me this man’s name

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(via jesuschristvevo)

shavingryansprivates:

anything less than like 35mm just looks so bad to me

(Source: iopoooed, via nyehs)

(Source: sazandoras, via rhydonmyhardon)

Anonymous asked: tell us your most embarrassing story

jesusinc:

jesusinc:

So a while back i was at this party and i was the first girl to arrive and there were like 20 guys already there, we were all siting around, having a beer and whatnot when the dj arrived. So all the guys went out the front of the house to help set up the dj gear and it was just me sitting there alone in the backyard for like 5 minuets. I stood up to go follow them bc i was getting really bored when i realized something, my period had gone through my white pants and stained the while chair, i was humiliated, i had no idea what to do, i could hear the guys were coming back and i had to do something quick, time was running out. So i grabbed the chair, ran like 10 meters and threw it over the fence into the neighboring yard, i quickly walked back and tied my jacket around my waist. The guys soon returned and didn’t suspect a thing, i am amazing.

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(Source: fauxhawks, via eroomylime)

(Source: wavecaps, via rhydonmyhardon)

tyleroakley:

Jesus came back on the third day for this.

(Source: do-you-have-a-flag, via eroomylime)